41 placed in the custody of the women folk to safeguard her person and reputation. The father of the man would thereupon be informed of the presence of the woman in his homestead and of his son’s desire to marry; 72.5 sexual intercourse between the couple is strictly prohibited during this period. If it does occur between the couple either willingly or by coercion, it is punishable by the payment of a fine or “bopha” of one herd of cattle to the woman’s father. This, Nhlapo remarks, is akin to damages for seduction at common law; and 72.6 the man’s family would then send an invitation to the woman’s homestead either on the day of the mock abduction or on the following morning to inform her family that she was with his family. This would be a signal to the woman’s family that the man’s family wished to commence negotiations for their marriage. [73] Nhlapo contends that a pivotal tenant of customary law is that no marriage is possible without the consent of the woman’s parents. Therefore if following an ukuthwala the woman’s family rejects the proposal she has to be returned to her home along with the payment of damages for the unsuccessful ukuthwala. If on the other hand her family accepts the proposal she would be returned to her home to be prepared for the nuptials and regular lobola negotiations would