19 deliberate effort to minimize her femininity by cultivating a masculine appearance in her physique and dress. She finds feminine odour repugnant and from her childhood has felt a need constantly to wash her hands. She is still very afraid of the dark. [35] About 1980, for reasons not explained in evidence, the plaintiff studied for and passed standards 9 and 10 and attended classes at P E Technikon where she qualified as an architectural technician. She has since supported herself as a draughtswoman. [36] During 1991 the plaintiff’s mother became seriously ill. The plaintiff was brought once more into social contact with the defendant. When he spoke to her she swore at him ‘dat dit bars’10. Her counsel asked her in evidence to describe the substance of what she had said to him to which she responded, ‘Wat jy alles aan my gedoen het, moenie nog met my praat nie, moet niks met my te doen hê nie, los my net uit’11. What this exchange was said to have revealed became a key aspect in the submissions of the defendant’s counsel during the appeal that the plaintiff was by then, at least, fully cognizant of where responsibility for her childhood abuse lay. I shall return to his submissions at an appropriate stage. [37] At a certain point in the plaintiff’s relationship with Ms Potgieter, in the course of an alcohol-induced argument about the plaintiff’s reluctance to engage in sexual relations, the plaintiff retorted (in substance), ‘I wish [the defendant] had done things to you, then you would understand how I feel’. She placed this conversation as having 10 ‘profusely’ 11 ‘Because of all that you’ve done to me, you mustn’t talk to me, you mustn’t have anything to do with me, just leave me alone.’